10 questions women are most concerned about when it comes to their first night

The first thing you come into contact with on your wedding night is the "hymen" issue. The hymen has always played a more important role in social and moral concepts than other sexual organs. This is because its integrity has always been considered a reliable indicator, or even the only indicator, for determining a woman's chastity.

1. Does bleeding and pain mean that you are a virgin?

The first thing a newly married couple encounters during their first sexual intercourse is the "hymen" issue. The hymen has always played a more important role in social and moral concepts than other sexual organs. This is because its integrity has always been considered a reliable indicator, or even the only indicator, for determining a woman's chastity. In fact, from the perspective of medical practice, it is not scientific to judge whether a woman is a virgin based on whether there is bleeding and pain.

Because not every virgin experiences bleeding or pain during their first sexual intercourse. Moreover, the characteristics of the hymen vary from person to person. It can be thin, thick, loose, tight, large or small, and its shapes are also different. Some rupture due to strenuous exercise, cycling, falls, trauma, menstrual plugs, masturbation, etc.; some have their hymen retracted on their own due to old age; some are not very obvious at birth; some have a very stretchable hymen and remain intact despite multiple sexual intercourse. Therefore, it is obviously extremely unfair to judge a wife's chastity solely based on her hymen.

2. What to do if first sexual intercourse fails?

It is also very common to have sexual intercourse failure on the wedding night. According to analysis, the main reasons for failure of first sexual intercourse are: 10% of the time the penis is flaccid before intercourse (caused by excessive tension); 8% of the time ejaculation occurs before intercourse or as soon as the penis touches the female vagina (caused by excessive excitement and impatience); 35% of the time it is due to pain on the part of the female; 15% of the time the female does not know the location of intercourse; and 20% of the time the cause is unknown.

On the other hand, the failure of the first sexual intercourse is related to the experience of caressing. 2/3 of the failures are those who have no experience, 1/3 of the failures can understand the reasons after the first sexual intercourse fails, and most of the failures can successfully combine after 2-5 attempts. So even if you fail, there is no need to be impatient or have any concerns. You can try again after a short rest, or wait a day or two until both parties are emotionally stable and the fatigue of the honeymoon is relieved before trying again.

If the man fails, the woman's accusations of being "useless" or "terrible" will often make the man feel deeply ashamed and uneasy, suffer greater psychological setbacks and fall into trouble. At this time, if the woman can be reasonable and say some sweet words as if nothing has happened, giving encouragement and comfort to the man, the man will regain his courage and seek a harmonious and happy sex life.

3. Does the outflow of semen after sexual intercourse affect conception?

It is a common phenomenon that semen leaks out of the vagina after sexual intercourse. In fact, although each ejaculation can discharge about 2-5 ml of semen, which contains hundreds of millions of sperms, only a very small number of sperms can finally pass through the cervix and uterine cavity to reach the fallopian tubes to wait for fertilization, generally only 15-50, and no more than 200.

Among them, only the sperm that arrives first and has good quality will be selected by the egg and combine with it to complete the mission of continuing life. Most of the remaining sperm are rejected from the uterus and discharged from the vagina along with the semen. In order to prevent semen from flowing out and increase the chance of conception, the woman's buttocks can be raised during sexual intercourse, and she should lie on her back for two hours after intercourse to ensure that the semen submerges the cervix and reduces its outflow. As for the excess semen being discharged from the vagina after sexual intercourse, it is a natural phenomenon and generally has no effect on conception.

4. Should I use contraception during my honeymoon?

Nowadays, wedding travel is quite common. Although it has many advantages, newlyweds should not forget to pay attention to contraception, so as not to sow inferior "seeds" at this time and regret it for the rest of their lives. Because travel leads to irregular life, stress, mental and physical fatigue, the body's resistance also decreases, which will affect the quality of sperm and eggs. Besides, the climate varies greatly from place to place during the journey, making it easy to catch a cold. In addition, the crowds are mixed, pollution is widespread, and the bathing and accommodation conditions are poor, which can easily induce and spread diseases. In particular, infection with rubella virus and sexually transmitted virus bacteria is an important cause of miscarriage, premature birth, stillbirth, fetal malformation or secondary infertility.

Medical and geneticists believe that conception is best achieved under comfortable and pleasant living conditions. From the perspective of eugenics, newlyweds who want to get pregnant early should not go on a honeymoon. Couples on their honeymoon should take contraceptive measures and it is best to wait 1-2 months after the trip before conceiving.

5. What contraceptive method is best for newlyweds?

If newlyweds do not want to have children too early, they can use contraception. It is best to use condoms and contraceptive cream, which can not only ensure the contraceptive effect but also increase the lubrication of the vagina. Condoms have no side effects and are the most hygienic. If used properly, they will not only not affect the pleasure of sexual life, but also prevent some infectious diseases between couples. They are safe and reliable for both couples and future children. If there are no other discomforts, you can continue to use this method of contraception. After 2-3 months of marriage, when the woman's vagina becomes looser, you can also use a vaginal diaphragm plus contraceptive cream.

6. Will contraception affect sex life?

For newlyweds who are preparing to take contraceptive measures, the first question they repeatedly consider is probably whether contraception will affect the normal response of their sexual life. In fact, a large number of scientific experiments have proved that various contraceptive measures, such as male condoms, female vaginal diaphragms, oral contraceptives and IUDs, not only have no adverse effects on the human body, sexual function and sexual life, but also "provide freedom and psychological liberation for sexual life." The so-called "sexual discomfort" that some people experience is not caused by the measures themselves, but is the result of psychological illusions, misunderstandings and even distortions caused by long-term social influences.

7. Which diseases are not suitable for pregnancy temporarily or for life?

Every newlywed couple hopes to have a healthy and intelligent child. To achieve this goal, brides suffering from the following diseases should not get pregnant for the time being. Such as heart disease, hepatitis, nephritis, tuberculosis, diabetes, hyperthyroidism, asthma, epilepsy and other diseases. In addition, if the woman suffers from benign tumors in the abdomen, pelvis, breast, thyroid and other parts of the body, surgery or treatment should be performed before pregnancy to avoid aggravation of the disease during pregnancy and making it difficult to deal with. If one or both spouses is suffering from dementia or mental illness, they should not get pregnant for the rest of their lives.

In addition, people with severe heart disease, poor heart function or heart failure should not get pregnant for life to avoid aggravating their condition after pregnancy and putting their lives in danger. Therefore, people suffering from such diseases should take sterilization measures after marriage.

8. What diseases should be avoided during sex?

One is urinary tract infection. Such as urethritis, cystitis, pyelonephritis, etc. The prevention method is that both men and women should wash their vulva frequently. Both parties should clean their genitals and vulva before each sexual intercourse. It is best for women to urinate once and clean their vulva again after intercourse to reduce the chance of infection.

The second is syncope during sexual intercourse. Because the bride is overly nervous, fearful or excited, her heart rate increases, and she may experience symptoms of cerebral anemia during intercourse, such as palpitations, shortness of breath, pale complexion, cold sweats, low blood pressure, weak pulse, cold limbs, trance, and aphasia. If this happens, the bride's head should be lowered and she should drink a cup of sugar water. She will generally recover slowly. If she is still unconscious, she should be sent to the hospital for treatment. The preventive measures are that the bride should be in a good mood and not be overly nervous, the relationship between the two sides should be harmonious, and the groom should restrain himself, be gentle and avoid being rough.

The third is female vaginal injury. Such as vaginal tearing, excessive bleeding, vaginal vault damage, etc., these are all caused by the groom's rough movements and excessive force. These accidents may happen especially when the husband lacks self-control and has rough sexual intercourse after drinking, and some may suffer from excessive bleeding and go into shock. If this happens, you should stop sexual activity and press the bleeding area with a sterilized cotton ball for a while. If the case is serious, you should go to the hospital for treatment.

Fourth, vaginismus. A very small number of brides, due to their lack of understanding of sexual activity, develop a fear of it and experience vaginal spasm during intercourse, making it difficult to carry out intercourse smoothly or even causing the penis to become stuck, making it difficult to pull out. The way to prevent it is that the bride should cooperate, not be nervous, and regard sexual intercourse as a part of a happy and fulfilling life. When you have vaginismus, you can take antispasmodics and sedatives, such as atropine, luminal, etc., once half an hour before sexual intercourse. If the vagina is deformed or narrow, you should go to the hospital for treatment. Fifth, the man’s penis is damaged. Some grooms are impatient and aggressive during sexual intercourse, causing damage to the glans, rupture and bleeding of the frenulum, and severe pain. Those with mild pain can recover by resting for a few days, while those with severe pain should go to the hospital for treatment in time.

9. How to differentiate between oral contraceptive pill reactions and early pregnancy reactions?

Most women do not experience side effects after taking birth control pills. A very small number of women may experience early pregnancy-like reactions after taking the pills, such as nausea, vomiting, upset stomach, dizziness, bleeding or decreased menstruation. These symptoms are similar to early pregnancy reactions. If a married woman experiences the following four symptoms, she should consider whether she is pregnant: one is amenorrhea, two is the appearance of early pregnancy reactions, three is increased frequency of urination, and four is breast tenderness and coloration.

Early pregnancy reactions usually occur about 6 weeks after amenorrhea, including dizziness, lack of energy, fatigue, drowsiness, fear of cold, poor appetite, and picky eating, such as liking sour, sweet, or spicy foods. There are varying degrees of nausea or vomiting in the early morning. This reaction can be mild or severe depending on individual physical characteristics, and usually disappears on its own about 12 weeks after menstruation.

10. Should I have an abortion for my first child after marriage?

Newlyweds should be cautious about whether to have an abortion for their first child after marriage. Newlyweds who do not want to have children and have not taken any contraceptive measures need to consult the gynecology department of the hospital to choose and implement a contraceptive method that suits them to avoid abortion due to pregnancy. Of course, this does not mean that women who have not given birth cannot have an abortion. If an abortion is necessary, when is the best time to do it? For women who have never given birth, the sooner the better. Currently, many hospitals have launched early pregnancy suction surgery limited to 40 days of pregnancy. This surgery is more suitable for women who have not given birth.