Old and young --- This is the 3258th article of Dayixiaohu

This is the 3258th article of Da Yi Xiao Hu

The term cognitive impairment is somewhat unfamiliar to most people. Most people do not know about this disease, and most people are used to assuming that cognitive impairment is Alzheimer's disease, including me.

But later, I didn’t think so. The story begins with the encounter with Grandma Gao at the Unforgettable Tea Restaurant.

The first time I met Grandma Gao, I saw a completely different person from Northeast China. Grandma fully understands fashion elements, and her patchwork style and a fashionable scarf make her look fashionable and intellectual.

Grandma is shy and not good at starting a conversation, so I often take the initiative to bring up topics and communicate with her. "Grandma, why are you here today? What did you have for breakfast? What have you done at home these days?" and so on. I can't get any answers, and they are always some meaningless "nonsense", but grandma is very cooperative with me and answers happily. When serving, I also stay with grandma, just like taking a child to learn to do something, teaching her step by step what to do and what to say, for fear that she will have problems and dangers without me.

The second time I met Grandma Gao, she was more eloquent and proactive. I wonder if it was because of the excellent teacher, Grandma Caiping, during my absence. But sometimes she was still a little timid, so I would guide her to see if the guests needed anything, pour a glass of water, and chat... Once, she met a guest from the same hometown, and she actually sat down and chatted with him for half an hour. This was really different from the first time I met Grandma Gao!

The third time I met Grandma Gao, she greeted me enthusiastically and did all the preparations by herself. During the service, she was more proactive in greeting guests at the door, observing their dining situation, and pouring water for them at the right time. Although Grandma Gao sometimes forgot to take the disinfectant hand sanitizer, I signaled her from a distance, and she immediately trotted to get it, patted her head and smiled at me, just like a cute child. This time I watched from a distance the whole time and never went up to disturb her. I, as a "parent", can finally let go!

I can't forget that the restaurant is healing the elderly and helping me grow up. In the past, when I communicated with my own elderly, I always listened. I was not good at speaking and didn't know what the elderly wanted to know. After this volunteer activity, I found that in fact, when communicating with grandparents, there is no need to output what we call useful knowledge. You just need to accompany them and listen to them. Sometimes I just stand beside the elderly like a small stake, and they will pat me and give me a very cute smile.

If one day we meet an elderly person with cognitive impairment, please exchange roles. Now, you are no longer a child, try to take on the role of an adult, think about how they have been doing since they were young, spend more time with them, take care of them, and give them more care and love.

It is not just the elderly with cognitive impairment, but also many ordinary elderly people around us. Between the elderly and children, we often subconsciously pay more attention to the latter. Maybe it is because the elderly represent people with certain experience, certain abilities, and can take care of themselves. Children are just the opposite, they may not be able to do anything well. It may also be because the elderly do not have the vitality of children. People are always attracted by the blooming flowers, but pass by the big trees again and again without noticing.

Arthur Clarke's epitaph reads "He never grew up, but he never stopped growing." The same is true for the elderly. They are indeed getting older and growing up, but I believe they have never grown up. The elderly we see are those who have seen thousands of sails and are calm after the storms. But there is always a child hidden in their hearts. I have always felt that the elderly with cognitive impairment are actually lucky because they have the opportunity to release this child.

Can ordinary old people become children again with our care?

Unit: School of Nursing and Health Management, Shanghai University of Medicine and Health Sciences

Author: Shen Jianing

Instructor: Xu Ting

Introduction to Wang Bu Le Tea Restaurant

Forget Me Not Tea Restaurant is the offline store of "Forget Me Not Restaurant". "Forget Me Not Restaurant" is the first documentary observation charity program in China that focuses on cognitive impairment. It became the highest-scoring program on Douban for two consecutive seasons from 2019 to 2020. It also won many public welfare communication program awards such as the "Annual Online Variety Show" at the 8th China Internet Audiovisual Conference. The program is led by celebrity store manager Huang Bo and others to run a restaurant with elderly people with cognitive impairment, allowing them to do some work as waiters within their capacity and communicate with the outside world as much as possible. This is a very scientific and effective means of "non-drug intervention treatment". Through the program, a positive and optimistic attitude towards life is further spread, knowledge on the prevention and treatment of cognitive impairment is popularized, and people who work hard to live are given a voice. On the closing day of the second season of the program, it was officially announced that the offline store of "Forget Me Not Restaurant" will be permanently open to the public, extending the warmth and touching online to offline.

The "Wangbulao Tea Restaurant" is located in Yongjia Court, No. 570, Yongjia Road, Xuhui District. The restaurant will carry out public welfare advocacy, popular science, and concept dissemination functions, and operate as an independent public welfare project. The restaurant implements the "Wangbulao Restaurant Elderly Staff Service Recruitment Plan" to regularly provide jobs for the elderly, especially those with cognitive impairment, to create opportunities and environments for them to communicate with the outside world, and to gain something through their service and continue to realize their self-worth.

Wangbulao Restaurant has cooperated with "Dayi Xiaohu Medical Communication Think Tank" to jointly build a "Big Health Project Management Demonstration Base", with the goal of creating a Shanghai health culture landmark and a city volunteer service business card.